TonyPotter

Lights! Camera! Trial!

Sometimes lawyers tell clients to “forget what you may have seen in the movies; your trial will be nothing like that”. Maybe, but there will be a courtroom, a Judge, an opposing attorney, witnesses, exhibits, etc., just like the movies. True, a Joe Pesci-esque character will not likely come into court with a leather coatContinue reading “Lights! Camera! Trial!”

Tenet Five

The last tenant: showing grace. For me, the thing with grace is the troubling part where it comes off as patronizing, rehearsed, or even false. Lately I have heard a lot about grace. “Thank you for showing me some grace,” etc. That is usually very nice to hear, and I am sure many times theContinue reading “Tenet Five”

Tenet Four

Couple of disclaimers: 1) I tend to put a lot of stock in honesty; and 2) I do not tend to put a lot of stock in “my truth.” The first was how I was raised, and the second is my own opinion. Nature and nurture. To start, I think we need to be sureContinue reading “Tenet Four”

Tenet Three

Being positive. So, before I get started on this, I want to address toxic positivity. The definition seems to be no matter the circumstances, a person maintains a positive attitude. The pushback is being positive all the time overrides emotions somehow lessening them. I think the pushback is well intended, but misplaced because: “Toxic” isContinue reading “Tenet Three”

Tenet Two

Now that you have mastered speaking with kindness and listening with kindness, it is time to tackle what I think is the most difficult tenet: holding a boundary. There are many different ways to describe holding a boundary, and the definition that works for you should be the one you follow. For me it isContinue reading “Tenet Two”

Tenet One

Last time we addressed five tenets and how they can improve communication. The idea is using the tenets to shape how you communicate with someone and help focus the issue, and possibly avoid confrontation. To recap, the tenets are: Speaking/listening with kindness Holding your boundaries Being positive Being honest Showing grace I am not sureContinue reading “Tenet One”

The Five Tenets

Warning: this might not be a legal article. I don’t have any letters after my name (Ph.D., etc.) that give the following any scholarly weight. Granted, I took nine whole hours of psychology in college, but that was (gulp) 30 years ago and I don’t think I aced the classes. But, contrary to some opinions,Continue reading “The Five Tenets”

How a Divorce Works (part 2)

Now that you understand the language, we need to talk about procedure. There seems to be two schools of thought on procedure: 1) the rule of law is sacrosanct and must be followed strictly upon pain of death; or 2) as long as everyone comes to the courthouse on the same day and at roughlyContinue reading “How a Divorce Works (part 2)”

How a Divorce Works (part 1)

After deciding on a lawyer, and having the attorney decide on you, the next “most important step” is to understand the process. Your understanding of the process, and avoiding the “Oh, I did not know that was an option” conversation, is crucial. If you do not understand the process, then you might not be ableContinue reading “How a Divorce Works (part 1)”

Picking a Client

I thought it might be helpful to know how lawyers go about picking clients. Or, at least how I go about it. Understanding the beginning of the process might help prepare you for when you have to make a personal, and potentially expensive, decision while under considerable stress. There is no one way to selectContinue reading “Picking a Client”